Christmas Eve Eve

The Stoned Soup Club has hereby declared that holidays with the family are infinitely more tolerable if you've had your own made up holiday with your friends beforehand.

Cue "Christmas Eve Eve".

This holiday, it wasn't planned. On the Eve of Christmas Eve, my day started out like any other. I went to work, dealt with high school kids who were only 8 hours and counting from a 9 day vacation, sat through each class' Christmas party eating pizza and wondering why I even bothered to show up to work in the first place, and then drove home. I was most certainly in the mindset to party as I contemplated the idea of 250 hours of sleeping/smoking/video games/internet tv ahead of me, but the plans for the evening seemed mellow. mac had prepared a Nut Loaf* that was ready to be put in the oven, we were going to make some garlic mashed potatoes, and have a nice meeting with my roommate and our friend from a few blocks over. I arrive home to find my other roommate and his girlfriend home, and they are into the idea of food too. Our number jumped from 4 to 6. A little while later I received a call from my best friend, who I hadn't seen in weeks due to the complete time vacuum that is Finals. He asks what I'm doing that night, and our number moves from 6 to 7. Now I'm a bit worried that we won't have enough food, so we quickly decide to add Cauliflower Au Gratin to the menu.

This is a good tip for the veteran Stoned Souper. Always have a really easy, quick, delicious side dish or 2 you can pull out of your arsenal in a pinch. Something you've made many times before, and you know will go over well. The problem with throwing parties that include mostly people in their 20's is that you can never predict how many people are actually going to show up. You can't send out invites, whether they be of a paper or facebook nature, and expect that people will a) respond or b) honor their plans, be it yea or nay. We're a hip, on-the-move age group that can't be caught making commitments. Things happen as they happen, and quick frankly, I'm ok with that. Keeps me on my toes.

The 7 of us ate our wonderfully rib-sticking vegetarian holiday fare, as the party continued to grow. It being holiday break time, we found ourselves surprised at the people who ended up popping in. We had more than enough wine and whiskey to keep things going, so we just sat back and enjoyed the ride. Remembering a greeting I had heard earlier that day, we dubbed our holiday "Christmas Eve Eve".

I must note, as a Strange Christmas Tree Enthusiast, that I met a guy that night who said he once chopped his tree into pieces and suspended it with wires from the ceiling, upside down. He became my holiday decorating hero, and I was honored that he admired our eyeball light/drunken angel tree effort.

Our party did have some bittersweet moments. One of my roommates is moving out soon to live with his wonderful girlfriend, and as a parting gift he bought our house a dinnerware set because, oops, turns out everything was his. He will be missed, that one. I also bought our house a Mr. Beer Brewery Kit, so stay tuned for The Stoned Soup Speakeasy.

Lastly, we need to mention Frank, because well, he truly made our holiday party all that it could be. Little back story on Frank:

Recently, my grandmother passed away. The extended family decided that the weekend before Christmas we should all get together at her house and celebrate, in honor of her. A widely known fact about my grandmother was that she LOVED decorating for the holidays, and that her taste was...well...eclectic, to say the least. My Mom took on the job of decorating her house with all of her crazy Christmas crap, and before everyone went home she devised a game where everyone put their name in a hat, and made the person they picked bring home a Christmas decoration of their choice. My Mom got me, and made me take home Frank because, basically, this thing scared the crap out of me, and she knew it. As people at our shindig discovered what he could do, he instantly became a hit. We decided to include a video because, as someone to aptly put, "Pictures wouldn't do this thing justice. This is the kind of thing that needs to be experienced" So here it is, for your viewing pleasure, "Frank The Lamppost":



Get it? Because it's supposed to be Frank Sinatra? Creepy. Many jokes were made about how it was only a matter of time before I woke up in the middle of the night to find that thing lying in bed next to me.

All in all, our holiday was joyous, and made the next few days MUCH easier to handle. So the next time you find yourself up to your ears in stress from whatever holiday is giving you trouble, just take a time out and get drunk with your nearest and dearest. You'll be glad you did.

-Nikki


*Recipe featured in this meeting:

Nut Loaf

1/2 cup barley

1 pkg mushrooms

1/2 cup(ish) breadcrumbs

1/2 cup dried cranberries

1 cup walnuts, chopped

1/2 cup butternut squash (optional)

1 shallot, chopped

1 egg

olive oil

sage to taste

cook the barley by boiling it in water for about 20 minutes, then drain completely. [side note: i love barley. it comes from my time living in scotland, and i think of it as a majestic highland food that is under-appreciated in most other places in the world. I throw it into lots of things. Stay tuned for more posts about my love for this misunderstood genius of the grain world]

While barley is boiling, chop mushrooms as finely as you have patience for, using a knife and some elbow grease. I tried using a blender once and it got too mushy.

Cook chopped mushrooms in a pan with some oil, the shallot, as much sage as you like [it's one of my top favorite spices, tying with nutmeg. more on nutmeg some other time]. Once the mushrooms have cooked down (about 10 minutes) turn off heat and set aside.

In a bowl combine the drained barley, the mushrooms, walnuts, dried cranberries, and breadcrumbs, and butternut squash if you have it hanging around. Have a good time mashing it all around. Don't be afraid to use your hands. I'll just assume you washed them real good first and don't need to be told.

Add the egg, and mix well. At this point if the mixture seems too wet you can add some more breadcrumbs. You want it to be a slightly sticky consistency, but not runny. Pat the mixture into a loaf pan. You can make it in advance as I did the afternoon of Christmas Eve Eve and let it sit in the fridge until your guests are around. Bake at 350 for about 25 minutes.

Slice and serve.

The SS Club Presents: A Very Mexican Christmas

Personally, I love Christmas trees. Can't say I care too much for the holiday itself, but I must say that the tree aspect really helps me tolerate the singing, shopping, and mandatory 1 night of church a year I endure to please the family. I will get a real tree every year as long as I live. Fake trees are an abomination to me, and I shall hear of no such thing. I mean really, the smell alone is worth the cost and hassle.

This year I purchased my tree from the Forestry class at the high school where I work. $30 for a tree 8 ft tall and 5 ft wide, you can't go wrong with that. So after a bunch of teenage boys with chainsaws loped off 2 ft (I wasn't sure of the height of my living room, but 6ft was all I willing to risk) and managed to get the entire tree INSIDE my car with NO doors or trunks open, I made the long, pine-scented drive home. And prepared to call a SS Club meeting.

While leafing through a authentic Mexican cookbook I had borrowed from the Culinary teacher earlier that day, I found a very enticing recipe I decided on for the evening: Crispy Lentil Cakes with Tomato Chipotle Sauce*. It was going to be a Mexican Christmas party.

The sauce was fairly easy, but the cakes were a little annoying. You had to cook the lentils for at least 30 minutes, plus freeze the individuals cakes for 30 minutes, so if you make this, be sure to give yourself a lot of time. Some of the cakes also fell apart, but thankfully the recipe made a bunch so that even with our disasters, we still fed 4 very hungry people with food leftover.

After eating, then the decorating! Now our house has always been more of a Halloween house than a Christmas one, but who says you can't have both? Our tree was decided to be far from anything traditional or "pretty", but instead funny, and maybe a little weird. We used the eyeball lights that decorated my porch for Halloween, as well as retro Christmas lights with bulbs so big I'm afraid to leave them plugged in for more than 20 minutes. The ornaments range from Simpsons characters, to tiny golden Elvis records, to amputated monsters riding sparkly balls that jingle, and everything in between. Also, as we opened up the bag of ornaments, I realized that one of the candy canes from last year had melted all over, causing many of them to look like they were bleeding. We went with it.

Our product:

A few ornament closeups:

I don't know what this is supposed to be, but it has no arm.

Clothespin solider at full attention.

Santa cop, patrolling the red light district of my tree.


And my favorite addition, the drunken, wine bottled, robot-esq angel. The best part is that the wine is called "Falling Star"


Coming soon- Tampon angels.

-Nikki


*Recipes featured in this meeting:

Tomato-Chipotle Sauce

You will need:
3-4 canned chipotle chiles in adobo sauce
4 garlic cloves, unpeeled
3 medium-large ripe tomatoes
1/2 teaspoon of salt

1. Lay tomatoes on a baking sheet and place about 4 inches under a very hot broiler. When they soften and blacken on one side, about 6 minutes, turn them over for 6 minutes on the other side.
2. Roast unpeeled garlic cloves in an ungreased pan for 15 minutes, turning occasionally.
3. When tomatoes are finished, allow them to cool and then remove the skins.
4. Put garlic, tomatoes and any juice from them, and chiles in a food processor. Pulse the machine until it has the consistency of thick tomato sauce.
5. Heat vegetable oil in a pan, and when hot, add sauce and cook until thick and dark red/brown, about 5 minutes,

Crispy Lentil Cakes

You will need:
10 oz brown lentils (not red)
1 medium white onion
Olive oil
6 large garlic cloves, unpeeled
1/2 cup finely chopped cilantro
1/4 cup Parmesan cheese
Salt
Pepper
2 eggs
3 tablespoons milk
2 cups dry bread crumbs

1. In a pot bring 2 quarts of heavily salted water to a boil. Add lentils and simmer on medium for about 30-35 minutes. You want them tender and cooked, but not mushy. Drain, and spread out on a baking sheet to completely cool.
2. Roast unpeeled garlic in an ungreased pan for 15 minutes, turning often. Cool, peel, then finely chop.
3. Chop onion and brown in a pan with oil for 10 minutes.
4. Mix lentils, onion, garlic, cilantro, cheese, pepper and salt in a bowl.
5. Use a 1/4 measuring cup and pack lentil mixture in tightly, to the top. Turn over on a baking sheet and lightly tap the top, dislodging the cake (The mixture isn't very sticky, so this trick helps you make an easy cake shape)
6. Freeze cakes for 30 minutes, to make breading easier.
7. Combine eggs and milk and a pinch of salt in a bowl. Spread out bread crumbs on a plate. Dip each cake into egg mixture, ad then cover in breadcrumbs.
8. Turn on oven to lowest setting. In 1/8 inch of oil, fry the cakes for 3 minutes on each side, doing only 2-3 at a time. When each cake is done frying, store in the oven on a baking sheet until finished with all of them.
9. Top of Tomato Chipotle Sauce, and enoy!